Why I Need Celibate Gay Christians

I’ve been invited to contribute to the blog Spiritual Friendship. Given the amount of current free time I have (can you have negative free time?), I’m not sure how much I will be able to actually write for them. But I’m pretty proud of my first post, dedicated to one of my dearest friends:

I was forced out of the closet by a phone call. A dear friend had confessed that she was struggling with attraction for a woman, but was trying to not act upon it because of her Christian faith. Our other two friends on the phone strongly recommended she accept her sexual identity rather than let her sexual practices be dictated by her religious beliefs. I—the once militant atheist—came to her defense and said she should let her conscience be her guide. If she believed her religion that deeply, then she should try to her best to adhere to it and we shouldn’t admonish her for prioritizing her religion over her sexual inclinations. This, of course, stunned them and I was forced to come out of the closet as someone interested in Christianity. I confessed that I had started doing Bible studies and attending church. These were the friends least surprised when I was baptized a few months later.

Being witness to my friend’s intense struggle as I came to faith—even though I myself am straight and will not personally share her particular pains—was an immense blessing. It was readily obvious to me as I counted the cost of discipleship that making the commitment to Christ would truly entail dying to myself and taking up my cross every day. I did not know what this dying would look like—Can we ever fully know what new sinful part of ourselves we shall be called to crucify years down the road? But I knew that the Christian walk entails—even for Western Christians with all our comforts—a great deal of suffering and no immediate promises of deliverance. I learned that repentance comes in waves, and that even the most faithful need God’s mercy again and again. I’m so grateful for my friend’s transparency in our relationship and her faithful wrestling with God through her struggle.

Read the rest here: http://spiritualfriendship.org/2013/08/20/why-i-need-celibate-gay-christians/

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One thought on “Why I Need Celibate Gay Christians

  1. This was a wonderful post to read, and although straight myself, cannot imagine the struggles one must face when hiding your true self from others. More painful though is hiding the truth from ourselves. I am in complete agreement with how you approached your friend, being a Christian as well, putting faith in the forefront. Sometimes in my own experience, my wanting to help others puts me in a position with the opposite sex wanting to take more than a friendly interest in me. But in my own head, I am trying to be a servant of the Lord and helpful to my fellow man/woman, and not seeing myself as female during those times. I would be interested in your opinion on that matter, and how you handle those situations. Thanks again!

    -B Monge

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